Experts Adivse: Ease Teens Into Self-Reliance

[muskanhossain]

Many parenting experts and child psychologists advise parents to acclimate their adolescents to an increasingly independent lifestyle by slowly granting more freedoms and emphasizing the responsibilities that accompany these liberties.
The following are five tips to keep in mind when helping to guide your child through adolescence and into a healthy and self-reliant adulthood:

Set limits and be clear: Phased independence doesn't mean unlimited freedom, and (believe it or not) most teens want parameters to let them know what is and isn't acceptable. Granting limited liberties and establishing clear guidelines are good ways for both you and your teen to gradually adapt to his increased independence.
Grant independence in stages: Though modern American society grants most "adult" freedoms and responsibilities to individuals the moment they turn 18, most experts believe parents should expand a teen's rights email data responsibilities gradually over time. By earning additional rights through demonstrated trustworthiness, your teen will have a personal stake in establishing what she is and isn't allowed to do.
Give options instead of instructions: It may seem like an inconsequential variation, but to a teen the difference between "do your homework now" and "you can either do your homework now, or wait until after dinner" can be significant. As children pass through adolescence and into young adulthood, providing them with expanded options is an excellent way for parents to cede some control without abdicating all responsibility.
Don't sacrifice safety: As Lenore Skenazy discovered, the definition of "safety" is a highly debatable one. Obviously, sending your 12-year-old on an overnight hike with no adult supervision is an unsafe idea. But what about letting him walk home from school? The U.S. Department of Education advises parents to emphasize the importance of personal responsibility - for example, making sure your child understands the rules of the road (and knows how to summon help if necessary) before allowing him to walk home from school. "The important thing to emphasize to your child is that, while he may be very healthy, death and injury during adolescence are most often caused by violence and accidents."
Let your children fail: For some parents, this is the most difficult step. But it may also be the most important. Allowing your children to experience the consequences of their actions, especially when they make the wrong choice or do the wrong thing, reinforces the correlation between thoughts, deeds, and results. And letting them fail in controlled environments allows them to understand that setbacks are not only inescapable, but can also be springboards to future successes.
The parent-child relationship can be infinitely complex, and every parenting strategy needs to be adapted to the unique circumstances of each family. But parents who encourage their children to take on increased independence and who require them to live up to greater levels of responsibility help build the foundation for a self-reliant adulthood.